I Finally Believe in Love, After 25 Years on This Planet

And it’s worth the wait

To my loyal readers, I know I have been absent lately (for about 10 months?). I have also been absent from social media which was therapeutic (Highly recommend). I’m trying to get back to writing, I promise to be more present.

Okay! Now that we have caught up, let’s dig in!

Back in February, I wrote an article about me not believing in love and relationships after I attended my best friend’s wedding (such an optimist, I know). In the end, I said that I was allowed to change my mind and I might end up believing in the fairytale after all. and I was so right!

How did that happen? You might ask. I shall answer shortly. First, I want to remind those who are too lazy to read my article (or simply want a summarized version) that I said I could not understand the power of love and if it was enough to make you want to spend the rest of your life with the same person. I also said something that now sounds so stupid to me. I said that I didn’t want to love someone because why if they die and I end up in pain.. HOW IS THAT LOGICAL, Ehssan? HOW??

So, now that I do believe in love, I wanted to correct myself and update you on my life a bit (I missed you)

It happened on a sunny evening.. No just kidding. I mean yes it did happen on a sunny evening but I don’t want to give you details. I’m still gatekeeping my relationship from the world (Don’t take it personally).

When I met the love of my life (Hi, my love), something in me opened up and allowed them in. I was sure down to my core that they were the one. That they were worth waiting 25 years for.

At first, I was terrified to let them in. I came up with fake boundaries and barriers in my brain to keep me from fully trusting them (they tore down those boundaries in 0.69 seconds). Before I knew it, I was falling in love. And I did not fight it.

Of course, I was panicking 25/8. I had literal wars inside my head that tried to keep me from seeking the happiness I deserved. But, safe to say, I did not listen to myself, I got out of my head, and I trusted the universe to do its thing.

I don't want to sound like a hypocrite, but being in love rocks! I love being loved. I don’t care if one of us dies tomorrow (I would kms) because I finally know what real true raw love feels like (Gosh I sound like Fiona, I swear) and I’m glad I got to spend the past 10 months with the person of my dreams.

I do believe that I’m with the person I was supposed to be with. I’m glad I never got to fall in love until I met them. I’m glad they are my first (toost).

Okay, just so you all know. I became mushy. My cold dead heart is warm and alive and I love it.

I realized that being in love does wonders for one’s mental health and physical. No wonder couples in love are always smiling, that shit is addicting. I noticed many things changing in my life after I fell in love (which happened exactly when I met my partner hihihi). Let me walk you through some of those changes.

I am happy and less depressed. Not because I'm dependent on my partner to make my mental health better. But, because I want to do the work and be better for me as much as for them. I wanted to be healthy and enjoy life more. So, I started working on my mental health (hence the social media hiatus). I also started prioritizing myself more, not by being selfish, but by listening to my needs and fulfilling them instead of waiting for someone else to do it for me (let me do it for youuuu.)

I also stopped being stressed (not completely, I am stress itself). I’m more laid back because I feel like I’m emotionally fulfilled. While I do stress now because of other factors that shall remain unknown, I believe I’m less tense, way less.

To conclude, love exists and it’s the best thing ever. Being loved is highly underrated, or at least it was to me 10 months ago. I hope I change my mind and tell you more about my love life. But, we are in our own bubble and I don’t want anyone else in it just yet.

Until next time, fall in love.