Can you fit into society standards weighing 90lbs (40kg)?

Can you overcome the trauma of being bullied because of your weight?

I’m a 5'2, 90lbs (158cm, 40kg) girl who lives in a society where the perfect body has to be 5'5, 134lbs (167cm, 60kg) with big boobs, tiny waist, and a big butt.

It’s been 6 years since my weight never passed 90lbs (40kg) and weighing the way I do was apparently a problem to people around me. I was told all sort of things such as eat more, stop moving too much, go see a doctor, you must have a tapeworm it’s the only explanation, and every other offensive thing you can think about, it was mentally draining and it took me years to accept my body.

How was I supposed to feel confident and secure in my body if I kept hearing all kinds of shit about the way I look?

In middle school, I got bullied by my classmates and even family members because of my weight. A boy called me a handicap once, and it became my nickname for the entire school year. He even created a Facebook group where everyone would gather and talk shit about the way I looked.

In high school, I went from being the ‘skinny girl’ to the ‘petite girl’ who everyone thought was a teacher’s 12-year-old daughter who came along with mommy to work. YEP, that happened!

I got sick of hearing ‘aw, you are so cute’, when other girls were being called beautiful I got stuck with the 12-year-old compliment, I’m not being ungrateful for anyone finding me cute but I believe that I got my share of the cuteness compliments and was ready to move to be perceived as a woman, not a child.

People around me tried to shape me into this mold that I would have never fit into. My family made me eat more, which made me do nothing but resent food! I tried everything I was told, everyone told me I needed to gain weight, but no one asked what I wanted, I wanted them to leave me alone.

It was strange for them to accept me for who I was and not for the way I looked, so I stopped trying and later caring.

It was with hard work and months of spending time with myself that I gain confidence; I learned how to love myself because I can’t control my body, I can only accept it.

If I look like a 12-year-old when I’m 22, I’ll look like a 20-year-old when I’m 30 and that’s something none of my bullies will get to experience! I’m also so small I can fit into every type of clothing no matter the size and even wherever I want, I can literally sleep in my closet and I would be comfortable.

It is with full regret that I inform all those who said those negative comments that your words, unfortunately, cannot affect me anymore.

~Ciao, Skinny b*tch is out!